Social working

I've had to begin the process of telling my clients that I won't be their social worker anymore. For some clients I'm cheering inside, but for others I am really sad to have to leave them. Probably more sad than they are. I've been in some denial about the whole termination process and I how I feel about saying goodbye to clients, my old position and the work I did, my fabuloso coworkers. I tried to meet one teenage client to tell him I'd be leaving and he took off once he saw me, in some denial about his own impending emancipation. I went to another home visit today and saw a kid and her grandma. Two very fun things that came from it.

1. She wanted to sit up close to me to tell me about a boy she has a crush on in her 5th grade class. Then she told me I smell like peaches.

2. Conversation between her and her grandma.

Kid: Grandma, I have something to tell you.
Grandma: Well, what is it baby? Something bad?
Kid: I had a stomach ache today in school and I felt dizzy. But then I told my teacher and it went away.
Grandma: Oh, that's all. That's normal. I thought you was going to tell me something really bad happened. Did you poop? Did you need to poop?
Kid: No, I pooped before it started hurting.
Grandma: Alright sweety.

Aw, how do you say goodbye to that?

New (mis)adventures

A shrimp and spinach noodle soup I made for myself last night.

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Two weeks ago I attended a yoga class. It was super mini, with only three people attending behind the instructor. The instructor seemed slightly annoyed that so few people attended, but powered on through the class. Well, one of the positions involved lying on your back and holding your feet. Right when I got in the position, I could feel it rumbling within me. Despite some struggles to get some abdominal control going out popped a queef. Boooeee. Of all things. And then we had to roll around in the same position. Again, unsuppressed queefs. And, mind you, we were in a big empty room with our mats all in a cross configuration, up close and personal. It was the first experience of vaginal flatulence in public for me, having long learned to master the muscles that control the other kind of farts. Mortification aside, I now see the benefit of Kegels.

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I went to Oakland's Chinatown to get some dim sum items for a potluck I'm going to shortly today. While walking back home with my bag of goodies, a homeless dude came up to me asking for help getting something to eat. I balanced my umbrella under my chin and started to undo my bright pink plastic bag. The guy got a disgusted look on his face and said, "I don't want your food! I want McDonald's!" and waved me off dismissively. Hey man, if you're really that picky you find someone else. I'll keep my pork buns, thanks.

Life is about to get a little easier

Well, I did it. I got offered the adoptions position. Wow! They liked my interview. Wow. I'm thrilled and totally dazed. I really did not imagine I would get any kind of release from my crazy work until I up and left child welfare or social work altogether. I now have to be open to the idea that I might like and want to stay in my job for a while. Wow. My mind cannot grasp the possibility. It will likely begin in June, same office, different kind of work. And I will likely carry some cases with me, but it will be so different. I even feel a weird sense of guilt that I got out when I did, when so many of my esteemed coworkers are bugging out over their work. But, it is a new opportunity for professional and less-stressful work. I can't even imagine. I get this sense my life is going to change for the better. In a big way.

I met with an admissions person at the school of public policy at Berkeley this morning. I had made the appointment when I was in the throes of despair over my job and thoughts of having to do it for more than another year. It wasn't a completely informative meeting, though to the admission's person's credit, I no longer have much intention of immediately returning to school and wanted more information about the profession or practice of public policy. Anyway, afterward I took a nice stroll on campus and realized something. I think I was depressed throughout my graduate school experience. In visiting my old building and walking along the paths by the Campanile, I can recall being in such misery the whole time I was in school. Scared, unhappy, and unmotivated. Hm, I don't know for sure what that was all about but it was interesting to realize how much happier I am now-a-days than just a year or two ago. Hmm, I think life gets better over time. At least that is my mantra at the moment, and I'm sticking with it. And also not in any hurry to go back, to graduate school or extreme unhappiness.

Onward single soooooldier...

Yeah, still can't bring myself to do online dating. It's ok though. I have much enjoyed being single, a.k.a. the period I can refer to as my whole life, so really I don't have much adjustment to make to anything different. And I am not, in fact, depressed like poor Boba Fett over there. I just thought it was a super cute picture that I wanted to share. But no, I don't need to hide behind a helmet or escape from life with a jet pack. But I don't then have anything of super excitement to report. I did an interview for a competitive position in adoptions. I hope I get it and achieve some escape from my current position, which haunts my dreams and weakens my immune system. Ugh, I've gotten sick again for like the third time in the past year. What is going on with my body? I have to get well before May when I've got two vacations coming up. Woohoo! I'll be heading to Washington DC for a cousin's wedding and to a see a friend. Then on to Malaysia with my mommy and older sister. That, I am looking forward to very very much so. Good curry! Market shopping! Fresh pineapples! Lat comics! Spicy noodles! Shaved ice! Sugar cane juice! Stir fried fern leaves! It's all about the food. Just keep my body together to look good for the wedding, then get ready to expand like crazy with some good and spicy Malaysian cuisine. Excellent. Hmm, I'm sure pigging out will attract plenty of suitors too. Mmm, greasy lips.

yi, er, san!

It's time to jump in and try things. For the most part things are going well in my life, save any progress in my love life. So, I think it is time to scuff up my boots and get busy. I just talked with a friend about trying this online dating thing. It might be fun for some practice and nice dinners, with hopefully some tolerable company. Anyway, that is the mini plan. I got a hair cut today too, to shake things ups with something new. I think I ended up with a Chinese diver look. Maybe it is sign that it is time to fly off the platform. Ike ike go go!

Do they give out stamp cards for birthdays?

I don't know what it is about February, but I spent this weekend at 4 different birthday parties. I bought so many cards at Papyrus that they gave me a stamp card. When is the next wave, April? I should get a card for myself. Maybe a really cheesy Valentine's Day card. As it happens, I will have a valentine this year! Someone whose kinda shy and has long auburn hair. This would be my friend's cat, for whom I will be cat-sitting over the coming weekend. But we will have a blast and cuddle and while discussing out long-term goals decide that we really do have common values and the foundation for a life together. More likely she will just pump some extra treats out me. Still, aren't holidays and celebrations grand?

(Sorry, I know that picture is just gigantic but I don't know how to resize it. It is so funny though...)

Need more...socks

I felt inspired by Aline Kominsky Cumb's autobiographic comic tome Need More Love to embrace my own curvaceous, trunk legs. Style is how you dress your own beauty anyway. These socks are so warm too! When are the days going to warm up already?

Fungus grows on fungus?!!

I remembered too late, apparently, that I had some produce that needed cooking. I though mushrooms were already fungus. What is with the white fuzzy?

Out of the frying pan and into...

I was thinking that I it might be nice to do a little review of the last year, make some markers of growth along the door frame, etc. (All this while still recovering from a pernicious cold I picked up in the subtropics of Houston. The humidity breeds more than mosquitoes, of that I am certain!) Though I must say I had a nice time in Houston seeing my family, which is a huge accomplishment in and of itself! Much less anger and bitterness, though still some lingering frustration with things that I cannot change about home, but hey, marking growth here. Ok, on to the real list.

-- Survived a year of work in child welfare! Huge accomplishment. I actually reached a level of competence where I am not constantly discouraged by what I can't do and am slowing racking up a sense of the things I can do. And with a job that is this crazy, I have to congratulate myself. Of course I haven't check my messages after being off for 2 week. Seriously, I hope all my kids are still alive.

-- Started working out at the gym. Something I never thought I would do. And it actually paid of in me feeling more confident in my appearance and how beautiful I am. Huge for a self deprecating Asian girl! Not that I have necessarily developed any real strength yet, but we're working on that too.

-- Pushed myself to try new things. Tried meditation. Tried oil painting. Tried to improve my Spanish. Tried a book group. Tried dating a bit more actively. We're not counting success right, but effort? I think I'm definitely making strides in getting out into the world. The only way to find winners to stick with is to juggle through some possibilities, and I did a lot more of that this year. And it wasn't all entirely painful. Nice!

Ok, so here is where I think about what I might like to try for the rest of the 2009. So you, my three faithful readers, can prod me along or tease me merciless if you catch me slacking. Um, be gentle, but firm. So let's see...

-- Make some clear career decisions. It's hard to gauge what I want to do with child welfare when the work itself is just a Jabba the Hut that I am trying to get my arms around, but I think this year will put me in a better place to examine what I do, how I do it, and if I would be truly happier doing something else. Ooo, and I guess I would also need to look at what job prospects are even out there. Dude, the economy sucks right now!

-- Do more writing. I think I'm fairly certain now that I process the world through words. And creatively writing is what I like and really gets me excited. And scares the crap out of me. But I really want to get writing into my life in a substantive way. And I have this idea for a kids book...

-- Moisturize. Ok, so that may sound trivial, or obvious, but I don't usually do anything about my face. But I went with a friend for chinatown-spa-day-facial-female-bonding and the lady giving me the facial was like freaked about my skin. She said, "Ni de pi fu hen gan! Dehydrated!" and proceeded to give me many samples of skin products. Hm, maybe not a subtle hint. So if I want to keep getting compliments about my nineteen year-old-looks I guess I need to take care of the skin on my poor beleaguered face. Yeah, the Asianness will preserve me for only so long. Damn it.

-- Take a kickass international trip! Beijing and Xian were super fun this year and I would like to repeat the experience of getting out and seeing things. Spend some of that money I'm earning on myself. And not on my retirement! (Ok, enough of that.)

-- Enjoy life and quit stressing out so much. At least for a year. I would like to really work on not worrying about whether I am going to stay in the Bay Area or not or stay in social work or not or need to figure out a permanent residence. I mean, not more than necessary. It will all probably become really clear after some time and it won't be a matter of making a decision but following the Dao, that not being the path of least resistance necessarily. Ok, this goal isn't making much sense. So this one will play out or not. Amend as needed.

Ah, the halcyon days of...winter?

Ah, zipping through the last of this Thanksgiving day-off-a-thon. It has been a like a nice, long, meditative breath before heading back into the harried responsibilities of work.

Work has been something of a grind stone the last few weeks, and has clarified something for me: I can't continue to do child welfare. And I'm not even sure how I feel about social work, though that thought is totally confounded by my frustration with child welfare. I let the fear and worry over the decisions I have to make in my job tear at me in a way that is not healthy. The responsibilities become enormous to me and the natural mistakes that I make seem so life-altering. Any "successful" reunification of child with family is troubled by the continuing dynamics of that family and the destructiveness that may very well persist and harm kids in their future. I remind myself now that my job is child safety, not the creation of perfect families or homes. But the knowledge of so much suffering is hard for me to bear. I can't watch movies at all where kids are in any way harmed. I feel sick knowing that these terrible things are happening to kids. And already happened to my own kids at work. I can't even imagine having my own kids anymore, knowing the things that could happen to these beings that don't even exist! Phew, let me take a breath. I have six more months to complete at my job, and then I can begin really taking stock of my options. I guess I can do that now, really, but I fear that I won't find what I'm looking for elsewhere either. Hm, enough of the burden that cannot be unburdened.

Let's remember these strangely warm days of winter. I spent a few days in Tahoe enjoying Thanksgiving with a friend's family. My friend's family is big, black, and kind. They made me feel so welcome when I missed spending the time with my own family--and the food was off the hook! I don't think I've ever had ham that tasted so good. And the mac and cheese was like heaven in a pyrex dish. We stayed in a rented house owned by a Japanese family. They have a bulletin board with pics of the generations of smiling, brown-haired hapa kids. It was fun to spend the time with a family with kids too, to walk to the beach with the kids and take turns throwing pine cones in the lake. The weather was odd. No snow to experience except by sight up in the trees of the mountains. It was frosty in the mornings, getting into a car and waiting for the windshield to scrape clear, that kind of cold. But sunny as anything. Ooo, I did see a coyote. At least that is what I think it was, though from far away it may have been a tan colored branch. The house overlooked a meadow that was framed in the distance by a line of trees, mountains, and very blue skies. I can see why people come here and keep vacation homes and go to the trouble of driving the maybe 4 hours it takes to get there throughout the year, though everyone was tittering about how the economy might affect the business of leisure activities like skiing and gambling in Tahoe.

The past couple days back in Oakland have been lovely as well. I've been enjoying the sun and warmth (this is winter?) and taking walks around the lake. Yesterday I also enjoyed playing with a friend's five-year-old daughter by lake. Kids are amazing. Everything for her was terribly exciting and funny. She liked spinning in circles and playing tag and wending her way through a series of dirt mounds that make a kind of maze, as she called it, by the lake. It was the perfect way to spend a day at the lake, having just perused the farmer's market.

I've been consuming books like candy these past few days too. Ooo, that reminds me I need to return one to the library today before it becomes overdue. Maybe I can get in a little kite flying today as well and call it a perfect weekend.

Circumference = fresh pumpkin and mooshy crust

I just made this pumpkin pie from scratch for a family meeting I'm having for work. I hope it comes out tasting good. Mmm, I miss not being with my family for Thanksgiving, but in the meantime I acknowledge that I am also part of an extension of many families. So here is to sharing that!

Blame it on the rain...

Gah, I was supposed to be at a meeting at a school in San Francisco today. It's rainy, it's San Francisco with its confusing confusing streets...I was an hour late! Damn. I retraced paths all over the place and got stuck behind people driving super slowly in the rain and then got caught in a bottleneck by some road construction. Oi. And the more late I was the more anxious and the more I was second guessing where I was going and missing turns. Man, I was so close to just putting the car in park and running into the school to get to the meeting. Which in the end was rescheduled anyway because everyone ran out of time to make any kind of conclusion. Which worked out for everyone. I think; I hope. And I don't think my lateness made a difference. I think; I hope. And on to the next day of work...

Go VOTE!!!

You know, I got this really cool Obama shirt that has his face like printed in gold foil, see above. I wore it to a street fair in Berkeley and was trying on shirts over it. I was a bit worried about how thin a shirt was because Obama's golden, pensive face was very clearly visible underneath. The clothing stand lady was like, oh, it's not so see-through if you don't have another shirt under it. I said, it's alright, it's just all that irrepressible hope shining through.

March of the Aunties!

Mist eats the Golden Gate Bridge

Omg, sunshine! In Muir Woods

Only you can prevent...environmental degradation that will wipe out of national forests and wildlife.

Mist eats Sausalito!

Aw, shops so cute I could eat them up like a cupcake.

Ah, this weekend was spent in the company of indomitable aunties! One from Australia and another two from Malaysia are currently touring America, visiting relative scattered all over. This was their first stop on their tour of relatives. My cousin and I took them sightseeing to Fisherman's Wharf (again, I can't seem to get away from that place!), Chinatown, the Golden Gare Bridge, Muir Woods, and Sausalito. We only went places where you can prove you went through the purchase of t-shirts, keychains, shot glasses, or snow globes. But it was actually kinda nice and it was really nice just shuttling around the aunties, some very spirited ladies that remind me of my mummy, and then some. Don't you love fighting your relatives to pay the check at restaurants? No shouting, no scuffle, no face!

Squirtle!

I got this bread cutie at Fisherman's Wharf yesterday. My work unit had an off-site meeting, where we caught the ferry at Jack London Square to the pier at Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco. I was reluctant to go at first--as going to FW twice in a year is really enough for one lifetime--but I was pleasantly surprised! It was actually warm and sunny, which was never the case in previous visits. In the past it was gray, cold, wet, smelly, and crowded. It was still crowded, but otherwise nice to be out and not in an office. And the shrimp at Bubba Gump Shrimp was really quite nice. I'm not sure I came away with hugely renewed energy for work, but maybe a nice respite and a carbo cutie. You are so cute I could eat you!

the grip!

so i'm home with body aches and chills. i desperately hope it is not the flu but the symptoms are not so promising. just when i got a notice in the mail about free flu shots... my sense of smell seems dulled to everything smelling metallic. is that a symptom of the flu too?

in other news, my peeping neighbor moved out this past weekend. I went to a meditation retreat on sunday where we talked about compassion and when I reflected on everything i still had a hard time with showing this guy any compassion. boo. i hope this brief episode in my life is over. the guy did only move to the next street over. and with no more supervision it sounds like than he had here. hmm, his new neighbors won't know what they're getting...

oi, back to wild. fevered dreams.

Asian eyes are made that way!

I went to the optometrist to get my prescription for contacts and glasses checked out. I've been sensing that my vision has not been so good and my contacts have been kind of irritating me so it was about time to get new ones anyway. Plus I have stopped wearing my glasses in public altogether (partly because the prescription is so old but also because the frames were never quite wide enough for my head so over time the screws loosen from stretching to accommodate my vast cranium, resulting in instances when one of the lenses would spontaneously pop out; this happened once while I was in class). So anyway, in the meantime I have also been living with a lovely bunch of breakouts on my nose. And I've been having a nice eruption recently which looks like an astonishing volcanic mess. So before the optometrist began examining me he asks me if I am having a herpes breakout! What! I had to explain that, no, these are only pimples. Gah!

So then on with the exam, the usual which is better the first or second, first or second, you're not saying anything so are they the same or what? Then, my favorite and I'm sure yours, the air puff test, whereupon optometrists are always telling me I need to open my eyes wider. No wider. Look surprised. Well, this time the optometrist tells me, stop having that sleepy look, open your eyes as wide as you can. Hello? I'm Asian. Sometimes we don't have that extra eyelid fold that makes out eyes bigger. I'm sorry, this is as wide as I can open my eyes! Ah well. In any case he caught on quick and held my eyes opened for the damn air puff. So it only took 2 tries each eye, whereas in the past I have had to put up trainees poofing me at least 8 times per eye.

Silver lining to my humiliation at the optometrist's office: new frames! I found a pair or glasses with the widest frames ever that don't squeeze my head or have to bend to accommodate it. Nice. I can't wait to pick them up.

I spy with my little eye...

So about a week ago I found an envelope in my door with a $5 and a note with my last name and apartment number, as well as that of my next door neighbor. I assumed maybe it was something from the management to both of us or something and figured I'd hear from someone at some point about what this was all about. So then last night my neighbor knocked on my door. He is a small, frail, old Chinese man. He had a $10 bill in his had that he was holding out to me. He asked me if I got his envelope. I said, "Oh, that was from you. I don't understand what this is for." He then thrust the $10 towards me, pointed at his eye, and said, "I want to watch you." I pushed the envelope and $5 back at him and locked my door, saying no no no no.

You see, from a few months back I noticed that he be around when I showered. We have adjacent bathroom windows across an air shaft. I had been leaving my window open a crack while I showered to let some steam out. Then when I was done and dressed I'd open the whole window and bam! His face would be there at the crack of his window. It kept happening that he'd be there. I couldn't tell if it was some coincidence that we would be in the bathroom at the same time and didn't want to be a bitch about it. So I just stopped leaving the window open and would wait until I was done to open it. And he'd still be there. And he'd sometimes smile at me. I was creeped out. So just recently I noticed a bit of mold growing on the ceiling of my bathroom. I was thinking that this keeping the window closed option is not going to be a good one. So I tried checking to see if the guy was there the other day and he was! Lights on, face right there, smiling. I slammed the window shut.

And last night it all made sense when knocked on my door.

I called the police this morning and they came to take an incident report. The officer also knocked on the guy's door to talk to him but he wouldn't open his door. I also called the apartment management. They said they will be kicking him out. I asked if anything like this had happened before. They said that a few years ago other residents had reported that an old Chinese man had been watching them. Good god. I left this morning for Seattle and will be here for a few days. I'm relieved to not have to be there at all. To even run into the guy in the hall or by the mailboxes... I mean, if he's lived there for years too who knows how angry he will be that I got him kicked out. Damn. Creepy.

Dentistry, smentistry

I realized shortly after getting back from China that the chip in my front tooth is back. Argh! All those dentists who insist that their cosmetic reconstruction will be permanent have got to be kidding themselves. Well, it's not too noticeable. This being the second time that a filling has failed to stick in the chip. It gives my smile character! It also means I can seriously tear up meat with a single bite. I wonder what it was that broke it again... Lamb skewers? Steam boat ox stomach? Ah well, back to the dentist. I can also threaten potential attackers with my bite. Come at me and I will take your finger off!

Greeting the pellucid dawn with spongy egg.

The flight back was almost odd. I sat next to a thirteen-year-old girl from Sichuan. My Chinese was so terrible and her English so piddling that I'm still not sure where she was headed for her English summer camp. But Disney was in there somewhere. Anyway, she kept asking me what was great about America. Short of launching into a historical critique of race relations, I tripped out that we had many kinds of food and our students are lazy. I asked her what she liked so much about the US. All she could really say was "I like America. America is good." Then she launched into Chinese using vocabulary that I did not know, so I can only assume she was commenting on the American entrepreneurial spirit and ideals of democracy. Though I did catch something about liking Coca Cola. The flight also fed us cup-o-noodles and a egg dish that looked something like a gray log. The girl was like, is this what Americans eat? Ha, are you kidding, we eat much crappier things than this. She also kept calling me big sister, which totally weirded me out. Almost as weird as when a guy called me ya tou.

Hmm, there is actually much to fill in as to activities accomplished before leaving China.

this room is enormous! they built a hanger to contain these guys

we are coming for you!

kinda cool looking hairdo

an acrobat, but he looks about ready to karate chop someone, kee-ya!

- You can't, of course, go to Xian without seeing the Ching Shi Huang Di's tomb. Or at least the soldiers he buried with his tomb. His tomb is actually still a mound that the government won't excavate yet for fear they don't have the technology to destroy the greatest archaeological find they have. So there are 3 sites and a fourth that was never completed. It is crazy how much enslavement can create. I guess I couldn't get over how much death it took to build all these clay dudes. And how all the workers and craftsmen were later killed to keep the site secret. The best craftsmen made the generals then on to the lesser clay figures like the acrobats. And I guess if you made something sloppy you were conscripted to be wall filler. The sight itself was actually a bit underwhelming for me. Hm, I think not the usual reaction. Death in the ground!

ah, piece of cake...

big mountain. itty bitty cable car

lady in our cable car. she's been on this mountain like 100 times!

locks on chains. so what does it mean if your lock rusts?

ah, so many itty bitty people. climb those steps!

the razor's edge

Ecotope!

gotta love that bad English!

little finger peaks

a little temple on a mountain peak

Scary cliff thing requiring wire clips

Taoist statue with a crouching creepy dude behind him

kittie on the mountain with a swollen toe

- Spent the day climbing the peaks of Mt. Hua. We took a 2 hour bus ride out of Xian to where the famous Huashan stands. I guess the mountain is famous for once serving as home to Taoist hermits. It was also made legendary in recent times as the setting for popular kungfu novels. In any case after a series of ticket purchases we took a cable car up to the North Peak. From there we tried hiking around to the other peaks, a total of five. I think we maybe only hit 3 but that included trekking up stone staircases on razor cliffs and little pockets of food stands. The mountain was pretty crowded, mostly with Chinese tourists. In fact, we rode up on our cable care with a couple that said they have visited the mountain dozens of times and the wife said that she first climbed Huashan from base to top when she was 13. In 3.5 hours. Crazy! Really to get the full experience you have to start your hike from the base in the afternoon so that you catch the sunset on the west peak. Then spend the night in one of the 6 or so hostels on the mountain top. Then catch the sunrise on the easter peak. Also the thing to do if you are a newlywed couple is to have a steel lock carved with your names, which you then lock on one of the supportive chains on the peaks for luck. An excellent full package honeymoon! There was also this additional sheer rock pocked with metal bars, wooden planks, and holes cut into the mountain that we were only allowed to climb with clips and harnesses connected to a wire. It was freaking awesome! The flimsy cheap life insurance we had to purchase was a nice touch.

- Xian happens to be one of the few, if only, Chinese cities with its original city walls intact. They form a big square in the middle of the city. And, this is the coolest thing, you can rent a bike and ride the entire wall in about 1.5 hours, which is what we did. Of course it was also blazing hot and many of the stones are all potholey which made for some rickety riding on our rusty rented bikes. But super fun! Great to stop at different food stands to grab ming bean ice cream pops. My friend was trying to launch a business idea of marketing the solar panel water heaters we saw dotting the tops of apartment buildings.

- Hm, and then there was the fact that I mistaken the departure day and took an hour long bus ride to the airport to realize that my plane left yesterday so I had to take the bus back to the hostel to purchase another ticket, at which point a worker at the hostel just came with me b/c my Chinese was obviously doing me no good in getting me a new ticket. Um, yeah. But i did end up making it back to Beijing in time for my flight back to the US despite all. I did have a physical tussle with the hostel lady trying to give her some money for her trouble and travel back to the hostel and she ended up physically restraining me and pushing me toward the security check. Ah, that's what being Chinese is all about.

- Met my mom's cousin and his wife in Beijing for my last night. Got to stay at their apartment. It was so nice to meet nice relatives! And fun too to see the inside of someone's house in Beijing. The sense I get is that everyone lives in pretty cramped apartments megaplexes. Their little neighborhood overlooked a cute park though with like public exercise equipment. So like yellow and blue painted public elliptical machines. I was like wow, the playground here is for the seniors, not the kids. There were also some middle age ladies totally tearing up a pingpong table. Oh yeah, in Xian I also had a change to wail on a Canandian playing badminton. Rock on with the only sport that I have any skill in! Damn, that is about as Chinese as it gets...

Movies watch on airplane:
- Nim's Island - cheesy but sometimes your just gotta watch a kiddie movie, you know
- The Spiderwick Chronicles - sometimes a kiddie is just not watchable...
- Definitely, Maybe - is that Breslin kid in all the movies right now or what? she was in Nim's Island too. movie was entertaining but the ending was not.
- Be Kind Rewind - kinda cool movie actually

Total books read on the trip:
- Blink - Excellent!
- Lady Chatterly's Lover - The copy I got was published by the Foreign Language Press and rife with horrendous typos. Great book though, I can see why it is a classic.
- The Hummingbird's Daughter - Really, really good book! Weaves the story of revolutionary Mexico with the story of healer girl, who actually existed. The book moves so beautifully.

So now I am home again. Just putzing around my apartment in a stupor of jetlag. Gah, I have to go to work tomorrow like this?

China! Refuel!

There it is. Can you see it? The white lady waiting to light her torch. I had to get on a guy's shoulders to get high enough to see over the crowd. How did all those Chinese people in front of me get so tall?

So you think this kid is cute now...

This much cuteness should be illegal!

Oh yeah, they'll put you on tv if you're white!

So this morning we got up at 6 to join some hostel-mates in the streets of Xian to watch the Olympic torch go by, which in China means a lot of sweaty ppl in the streets. More than the usual amount of sweaty people. But it was actually really cool to see so many people of all ages excited and out. Lots of hawkers with the "I love China" shirt that everyone was sporting. Lots of Chinese flags and Beijing Olympic flags. The torch bearing and passing wasn't actually that impressive. I saw a Chinese guy light the torch for white lady who then lit a torch for another Chinese guy. That was pretty much it. The did have like party trucks that preceeded the torch bearers though with like cheerleaders and dudes dressed up in rubberized Chinese armor to drum up excitement. Wee. We had a big white dude from Arkansas in our group who was getting into the Olympic spirit with a "I love China" shirt, red band around his head, and a bigass Olympic flag. Various locals asked to take pictures with him and a local news crew came up to film him yelling in Chinese, "Zhong Guo, Jia You!" (essentially "China, You can do it!"). The other highlight of the experience being this very cute Chinese boy decked out patriotically and holding a little white puppy. Off the cuteness charts.

Ah, I haven't really commented on the Olympics. Here and there different ppl in the tourist industry have complained about the slowing of business because of the new restrictions on visas that were just added for the Olympics, though it appears to have affected some countries more than others. The price for a US visa pretty much doubled in April. A lot of travelers are trying to tour parts of China then hunker down in Beijing for the Olympics, but it is pretty surprising the scarcety of foreigners right now. No doubt most tourists are waiting for the Olympics. I really can't imagine the craziness that will be Beijing come August. The public transportation and taxis seem pretty maxed out now with the locals. I think the city will probably shut down once the Olympics start. As if there are not enough people here. But I think the general feeling is that people are excited and proud that China is going to showcase Beijing to the world. I'm just glad I will not be there to be robbed, crushed, or ripped off.