Creative reuse

After the adrenaline stop jamming the neurotransmitter receptors in my brain, I was able to come back to Earth. I'm not going to quit my job.  In truth, a job will inevitably hit a point of drudgery, no matter what it is, but hopefully it feeds still one's core values and purpose.  But I think I ask a lot of my job to somehow fill all pockets of desire in my life, and I have to realize that it is up to me to fill in what my job does not give me.

Where I feel my job doesn't give me outlets for creativity and handicraft, I have to find the outlets that meet those needs for me.  I started attending a writing group.  I've also been tooling with little craft projects and I have felt the creative receptors of my brain spark a bit.

And I still have not exhausted making this social work thing work.  Maybe the greatest challenge with any work is to keep it dynamic and interesting and tolerable.  Maybe it is basic challenge in life to understand your resistance and responses to something, like the pangs of sadness I often feel when I hear stories of adoption from clients, that despite their hopefully happy outcome I cannot shake the tragedy that separates a child from her birth parents.  Or the disconnect of a social worker being a helper by trying to steer clients towards her or society's standard of normal functioning, when everyone in the world has their own paradigm and reality.  Maybe what bothers me about social work isn't really about social work, but about how to navigate a very confusing world.